Filly's

I used to have a nice red coat that my mother bought me for Christmas. I'm sure that she will be happy to hear her son drunkenly misplaced the garment at a strip club in Winston-Salem. The son also cut his finger opening a corona in a moving automobile, and busted his knee drunkenly stepping over a curb. Thanks for signing the checks mom, I'm really running with this higher education, mature adult theme. Kickass. I had never seen a stripper fall down on stage until my trip to winston. It wasn't that cool.

Frontsitter

I'm not a frontsitter. Never have been, never even thought about becoming one. Since the early days of childhood, I've made the back of the room home. My haven. Usually behind one of those kids that got a growth spurt or gained a shitton of weight over the break, so I hide and live in peace. All through primary and secondary education, this was the accepted location whenever seats were not assigned. But then you come to college, and the influx of overachievers begins. What the fuck? Why would you want to sit there? What are you going to get out of it, besides making absolutely sure the rest of the students think you're a tool of enormous proportions. Yet, people continue. Personally, I've found the Frontsitters tend to be the ones most likely to freak out and break down. Most likely to buy all the books, then bring the worthless motherfuckers to class, everyday, just to put them out and feel fucking superior. Frontsitters tend to be the fucktards that ask questions as the class is coming to an end, or perhaps right before a vital explanation of what they just chose to ask a question about. Fuck them. As for me, I'll sit where I can put my head against the wall. Might as well be a comfortable Underachiving asshole.

moment of clarity

I don't know how to go to bed early. It's sad, really. I tried last night; I got in bed at a pathetic 3:15am. My body does not believe in the value of the morning hours, and all the the trying in the world by the cognizant portion of my being has not changed this fact. Tonight, I do not do the usual tuesday night drinking; it has become abundantly clear that being drunk would actually assist in the sleep-provoking process. God, imagine the possiblities if I could be awake before 12pm! I'm not even sure what could happen really, the only time I'm ever up that early is for exams or work, and neither promotes a happy and productive modus operandi. It's troublesome. It's irritating. It's inevitable. Worst of all, I haven't had a fast-food breakfast in 2 months. No egg-fucking-mcmuffins. No made-from-scratch hardee's biscuits. No enormous omlet sandwhich from burger-shit king. Oh wait, that sucks anyway, and I never ate breakfast there because it's the world's worst fast food resturant. Fuck burger king, and waking up with the king, and any other gayass king activities that will plague the NFL playoff advertising. Think about it: one day, I wake up early, well, sorta early, like maybe 9am (let's not get too crazy here) achieve a productive day, and actually eat a meal called breakfast before a time called noon. Unprecedented, and probably inconceivable. Especially while staying up till 3:15.

Return of the King

Maybe if you drink for a few days, your brain just gets fried. Things are in about that situation around here. Sadly, when you don't have MWF classes, temptation abounds. But in the end, you realize that college is slipping away like sand in the bullshit clique hourglass, and you drink by the case. Yes, I'm wasting away, perhaps in margaritaville, but isn't it a good time? Only problem that arises from drinking on consecutive days is that you quickly exhaust your supply of totino's pizza and turkey lunchmeat. So if you decide that you want to consume on any given night, let me know, I'm sure i'll be game, or easily convincable.

Sandwhiches are pretty much kickass

I probably eat near a loaf of bread a week. Nothing is easy, fast, and satisfying like a good sandwhich. Maybe some peanut butter on there, or maybe some turkey. If you're feeling wild, you can even put a little baby spinach or something on there, toast it up a bit. IF you wanna get technical, hamburgers are just badass ground meat sandwhiches. And everyone knows how kickass chicken sandwhiches are (wendy's spicy chicken anyone?). You can make a kickass sandwhich when you put shit between bagels; since the bagels are like super slices of bread, its like a big kickass meal. Quesidillias are just mexican food's cheesy, and quite tasty, answer to the sandwhich question. Biscuits you say? Well biscuits make the most badass sandwhiches of all. Obviously I have an eating obsession that may be a problem. But fuckdamn, who can resist when faced with such temptation? probably I should resist blogging when hungry in the future...

Something Beautiful

Degree Tracking Requirements for: Phipps, Alex M
Swim Requirement: N
Cumulative GPA: 3.271
Expected Date: 5/06

-----------------------------GRADUATION REQUIREMENTS--------------------------------
1. PASS ENGL 83 (3 HOURS) AND PHYA 33 (1 HOUR)
2. PASS SWIMMING TEST REQUIREMENT

Degree audit system, University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill.

Best Sweater Ever

Man, my cousin lauren knows just what I wanted for christmas.