Watching the daily show tonight, Jon Stewart was his usual self (I like him because he's probably the only guy on tv in political discourse (yes, it is politics, come on) that will actually have a real point/counterpoint discussion without shouting/insulting) and when it was pointed out he might lose the state of alabama for a crack he had just made about an alabama supreme court judge, he said "oh come on, its alabama, like they have comedy central." Why is this noteworthy, since it's obvious I don't live in Alabama? Because Alleghany Cablevision (Sparta's best and only source for cable) DOESN'T HAVE COMEDY CENTRAL !!!!! It's a abserd joke on the Daily Show, but it's fuckin real life up in S-town, damnit. What do we have? We've got the goddamn SPEED channel, GAC (great american country), OLN, Tech fuckin TV, the motherfucking totally worthless UNIVISION, and various other cable un-notables. Why the hell do we have these stupid worthless channels when we don't have the cornerstone of modern entertainment? We have a community access channel that is just a powerpoint running on a computer in the high school "cyberclassroom" with announcements of what is for lunch that week! But the damn finest example of why alleghany cablevision is the biggest shitass organization in the world, is the channel of local announcements and the "current" date. See, around 1999 or so, everyone in the world made sure their computer systems were ready for the Y2K bug, so they could go ahead and advance beyound the year 2000. Round about 12:00 eastern, everything went smoothly everywhere; everywhere, that is, except for the office of Alleghany Cablevision. In the only example I have ever truly seen of the Y2k bug, the date changed not to 2000, but to some random year in the 1960's (perhaps this was done intentionally by the office, instead of going all the damn way back to 1900, so the days would match up; but damn, if you can do that, why not just fix the problem?) Everyone in the county thought it was funny, laughed about it some, and figured yeah, thats how it goes in Sparta. Over the 4th of July weekend, I was in Sparta. I watched the Cable. And the date is now July, 1972. WHAT THE FUCK!?! IT'S 5 GODDAMN YEARS LATER! (in case you think it is just a temporary glitch, I can assure you that every time I return, I faithfully check, just in case a miracle occurs. It never fucking does.)
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2 comments:
actually JS said it the other way around: "it's Comedy Central, you think I hava Alabama". kinda screws up your point...
Quoting right or wrong really has no relevance to my point "alleghany cablevision is the biggest shitass organization in the world"; sadly, whether jon's comment was about how backward alabama's cable system is, or how he's doubtful anyone in alabama watches his "gayass liberal douchebag" show, it was just an excuse for me to bitch about Alleghany Cablevision.
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